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Why females talk the way they do

posted by Peter September 12, 2016 1 Comment

Everyone knows that females talk differently to males.

And what they do talk about is more nuanced, self and situation referencing and ‘arriving at a conclusion’ compared to guys. Well mostly.

Put another way, boys and men tend to talk about the what of a subject.

Women, particularly when the subject matter is another person, will talk about the what, how, when and especially the why, why, why. At their heart they’re trying to understand what makes someone tick.

Now, they may not get this right, but, by circling their (collective thinking) wagons around the topic, they arrive at a conclusion. Whether this conclusion’s right or wrong is, essentially, neither here nor there. What women obtain is a reference, a world view, an opinion, and most of all a feeling.

Now, some women will say that feelings arise entirely from within themselves, influenced by nothing other than gut.

But that’s a myth. Like us all, they’re influenced by the last person they talked to, group think, a facebook comment, a mood.

If you ever manage to be part of a female conversation; keep quiet and listen.

It is an attempt to answer the why

In contrast to most male conversations where we put in little asides, crack a joke at our own or someone else’s expense, or add another fact, female talk is much more question and answer. It is an attempt to answer the why.

Why did he walk away from you? Why doesn’t he like me/you anymore? Why does she/he think such crazy thoughts?

The way women talk, take on information, tease out significance and meaning and tend to form a consensus view around a subject is COMPLETELY different to men.

There’s many situations where men, with hardly more than a nod, smirk or raised eyebrow or two will realise that we’re all on a similar wavelength.

Our ability to all be on the same page, almost instantly, is part of our magic.

Women have that too – but, as the 1979 song by Dave Edmunds says. ‘Girls talk’.

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1 Comment

Peter September 20, 2016 at 1:12 pm

Originally this blog was called Why ‘girls talk’.

A friend pointed out that term wasn’t right.

They’re right.

Hence the change, though a few residual bits of it remain

Reply

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